I am constantly observing the way children react to situations, their behavior, their happiness quotient etc. Why? Because I am always questioning myself as a mom. I wonder what the right things are to tell my children, the right way to behave, how strict I should be or how lenient should I be. And my disposition towards my children has changed from being very mild to being very strict and in between. Recently, I saw this video and it made a huge difference.
After watching this video, I was observing one of daughter’s friends who is such a well-behaved kid; the ideal kid who would be every mom’s envy. As a mom of a preschooler you are battling tantrums, meltdowns and rebellion all the time but I have never seen any of that with this kid…wow lucky mom!! This kid would not even howl when his friends snatched his favourite toys; all his mom would say ‘No Ishaan (name changed)’ and he just stood out. There was another instance when all the kids were given candy and they all relished it but this was not allowed and…he listened!! On the face of it, it was a wonder-causing moment for all the moms but that’s when I noticed a deeper emotion; of maybe fear or the feeling of being left out and a disturbance in his mental space. Maybe at the end of the day, it was not the best situation…
Just to take this further, I started thinking of this other kid in our colony; someone who I have never seen in clean clothes. Either it’s mud all over or food or something even worse. His voice can be heard 3 buildings away, he has this gleeful smile as he dances away from place to place. His mom rarely stops him from anything and looks equally happy. I wondered…doesn’t she ever worry that the kid is going to be sick? But when you see the attitude of the child, the inner happiness, the fact that he is enjoying every moment of his childhood-the mud, the noise- it all seems worth it! He is gaining experiences, taking sound decisions himself and seems better prepared for life ahead. I feel like he is much healthier, his immunity is up and he has become super proactive. Takes me back to my visit to my pediatrician when my baby was 6 months old; she had said ‘Don’t Say No all the time’, when she learns to talk, that’s what she is going to tell you.
Letting your child enjoy his childhood is just the most important thing because a happy child will lead a happy life. Of course, you have to guide, you don’t give in to tantrums but let ‘No’ not be your first response. Please judge the consequence of your ‘No’. It may mean a lot more to your child than you can imagine! After watching the video, I have decided to become a Yes Mom too, this doesn’t just mean saying just yes to everything but using your discretion a mom. Saying yes has in fact, given my child the confidence to tackle anything with a happy and positive attitude. It’s just been a few days and the difference is so obvious! He is more confident, I find that he makes friends more easily and is now ready to join in, no matter the activity. He has begun enjoying his meals, has his favourites and even helps me out whenever he can! I love being a Yes Mom and I invite you to join the movement too! #YesMom #IPledgeToBeAYesMom